Wednesday, December 12, 2007

SCD Explanations

Ahh the business lunch. One thing that I thought I had basically mastered. Usually the lunch is with an associate or two and located at a restaurant. If you are in charge you can steer it towards an establishment that you are family with or one that you are pretty sure will have a legal selection e.g. a nice steak or seafood place.

If this does not happen, you have to study the menu as if you were taking the bar exam while acting very nonchalant about it and being an active and engaged participant in whatever conversation is occurring. Your goal is to quickly identify a lunch entree that is actually made out of real, honest to goodness food and not otherwise smothered in some type of totally illegal gravy/sauce/marinade concoction.

On most of these occasions I find something that is both legal (win) and satisfying (jackpot!). At the worst of times I have to settle for an iceberg lettuce excuse of a garden salad with some less than stellar olive oil and explain that I am trying to keep it light. This line REALLY drew peculiar stares when I still weighed about 90 pounds. Now, thanks to a totally gluttonous year in 2007 having fun going from 88 pounds to about 115, people actually buy this.

Well sometimes it is a bit different. I have been at a buffet style lunch where absolutely nothing was legal. Usually I can get away with that old garden salad trick but the salad this time had some sticky raspberry dressing poured all over it. Now I was not panicked because I knew I would be able to eat after the meeting. All would have been good in the world except that as soon as I sat down without a plate the comments started fast and furious.

comment #1- Where is your food?
comment #2- Aren't you going to eat anything?
comment #3- Our food is not good enough for her (yes, I am serious here)

Sooner or later the comments stopped and I made it through without answering one of them.

I wonder what would have happened if I just said "Oh, yes well you see last year I got really sick and had to have several operations including some drains put into my abdomen. I think there were three in total and also a fistula. What is that you ask? Oh, let me explain during dessert. Well then I had to have part of my small bowel removed from my body, resectioned and then put back in. What an inconvenience. In order to avoid these types of minor unpleasantries in the future I am opting to follow a diet that consists of actual food unlike that sandwich of processed meat and processed cheese on that nutrient-free excuse for bread.
Maybe in my next life.

Breakfast- SCD yogurt with a banana and honey
Lunch- Sauteed Broccolini with chicken in a white wine, tomato, mushroom sauce
Dinner- Spinach salad with roasted chicken, pears, blue cheese, red onion, mushrooms, hard boiled egg, olive oil and vinegar



The SCD girl said...

I have to say, I totally sat here snickering at the "explanation" of your meal that you didn't say out loud.

Of course I'm in L.A., so if I said I was doing a "cleansing" or some such nonsense, people would be like, "Ohhhh" and leave you alone. Or say, "Is that the one where you drink maple syrup for a week?" Eeeeeeeuck!

I got to explain a little bit about the diet at our company potluck that I arranged. I sat at a table sipping beverages and engaging in sparkling conversation, and hardly anyone noticed I wasn't eating, anyway. :)

The Adventure Begins.... said...

We SCDers are pretty street smart.